Do opposites attract? How often do you see weird couples like a guy/girl dating someone who is boring with no sense of humor ?

Genetic opposite. Evolution want us to be with somebody very different from us, this lead to something call “Genetic opposite influence.” It is found that human can better appreciate each other’s strength and accept each other’s short coming, when there are greater genetic opposite between two people. This even exist among platonic friendships. For example, Barack Obama and Joe Biden.

In romantic relationship, two people can better accept each other’s short coming and appreciate each other’s strength when there is that great level of genetic opposite and therefore, increase the chance of sexual attraction and friendship to emerge. Romantic love is a neuropsychology, where sexual attraction turn friends into something more. This is why most long term healthy relationship started as (1) friendship or (2) similar to Charlie and Barney from Two and a Half Men and How I Met Your Mother, thinking with your penis and (3) then later develop into something more.

Hence, this is the reality of the so call “opposite attract.”

Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support. I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized. he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that. he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened. he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence. i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction. after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly. things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it. we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe … our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far? this has upset me so much its hard to even function.

In culture oriented towards committed relationship, that will be Middle East and the west, we see the highest rate of divorce and domestic violence. Interestingly, the west got higher rate of domestic violence compare to the middle east. Because, the Middle East marry their cousin a lot. So, cousin connection replace romantic love connection and decrease the chance of violence. The problem is that the Middle East got a lot of retard children today, because of that and part of the reason why it is so poor. Culture oriented towards real relationship over committed relationship got much lower divorce and domestic violence rate. This is also what we see in East Asia. East Asian culture is very Bad Boy oriented. As for the high rate of Asian girls dating white guys, what is going on is due to the Swinger Culture of the 1960s and 1970s and Hollywood going global. It is similar to why girls today are all going crazy for K-pop stars. But, this sort of feeling is just a tempory passion. It is not meant to last the long run. Similar to the honeymood stage of a relationship or one night stand. Some people are just not suited to go further. For example, during the 60s to early 2000s where the fed of having a white boyfriend is cool, the rate of white guys and Asian woman marriage, never exceed 2:1 higher compare to the opposite way around, despite the dating rate exceed 10:1 the opposite way around. Now with college kids today where the rate of white guys dating Asian women drop dramatically (due to traditional western value is committed relationship over real relationship and in post Swinger Culture era it is returning to that. So, girls that are born further after the Swinger Culture, are just not that interest in white guys.) and the rate of white girls dating Asian guys increasingly dramatically (and you can really see the difference, especially on college campus. I live near my old college campus and you see more and more white girls dating Asian guys and less and less Asian girls dating one guys each semester. Even I must admit having the feeling. I often go back to the college cafe for a coffee in the afternoon after getting all my work done in the morning. These days, you are literally hot among college girls just because you are Asian. You can really feel the difference. I am 40 years old and I tell the girl and the girls that is only 18 or 19 don’t care that I am an old man, it is crazy) But, the actual marriage rate. we can assume in this current culture where Asian are getting hot due to K-pop, and other Asian media going global through internet and streaming service and Hollywood is now on the decline. The actual marriage rate between Asian men and white women will never exceed 2:1. Even if the dating rate might eventually reach 10:1, until the fed is over. Most of those girls most likely still going to marry a white guy, eventually.

Instead, most compatible couples ended up break up or divorce, because, a lack of genetic opposite. People find it hard to appreciate each other’s positive trades and accept each other’s flaws, when genetic too similar. This is also why your mom will never be proud of you. So, most highly compatible couple ended up getting divorce. Most couples that last the long run, are mostly very different people. They usually only got a few critical things in common and can bond over that. But, in most other aspects, they are very different people and need to adjust. But, there is an old saying “When you love your job, it isn’t work.” The same is applicable to relationhip, because of a strong real relationship connection, it isn’t work for them. On the other hand, most compatible couple let few minor things drive each other nuts.

This is why most couples that can last the long run are “not compatible.” Our western society over oriented towards committed relationship (boyfriend/girlfriend term or husband and wife term) over real relationship (love or infatuation), instead of real relationship over committed relationship. To a certain degree we are even anti real relationship, e.g. Christian value think lust is a sin. Modern feminists are coming up with their theory of Nice Guys and Bad Boys saying “Guys willing to commit are great guys treating women well (Nice Guys) and Guys that won’t commit are jerks treating women like crap! (Bad Boy)” This got a lot of criticism from real feminism academic. For example, what if the guy willing to give you a wedding ring is a wife beater? Or “If you dump a girl after you got bored it is treating women like crap!” (Translation: If you are dating a girl that you are not interest in, you keep leading her on, otherwise it is treating women like crap!) This is why most girls prefer guys in the Bad Boy category. They want something real and most dating expert encourage guys to feel free to be what our culture call a Bad Boy, Fuck Boy or Chad, if this is our nature. (Providing you are not actually hurting people of course, e.g. you don’t drug a girl to get laid. Interestingly, in the real world it be guys in the Nice Guy category that will do that. It is found most in the Nice Guy category are the real assholes. Because, people that casually commit don’t take commitment seriously and those are more likely to be psychopath or socialpath. And most girls’ experience also be the same, the so call Nice Guys are the real assholes and the Bad Boys are the normal ones, even if they are not all great guys.)

In my experience, British people are fat, ugly and arrogant. Why is it and can it be changed?

Anyway, we are getting way off topic. Opposite attract is due to genetic opposite, the greater genetic opposite the better you can appreciate each other’s strength and accept each other’s weakness. Therefore, romantic love can better develop. Without sufficient genetic opposite, it most of the time can at most be suited as one night stands or it is not meant to last after the honeymood stage. If you choose committed relationship over real relationship, you are likely to be in loveless marriage and even toxic and abusive marriage. On the other hand, real relationships are not necessarily in need of a commitment, what our culture call a Bad Boy or Bad Girl. Compatibility is about committed relationship, hoping by having more in common will make the relationship easier. But, it usually won’t work. Just because you are compatible and have much in common doesn’t equal you got actual real connection.